Sadness

Motherhood has turned me into a pretty tough cookie. I used to be so anal (ok according to Stephen I still am, but so not the point I am getting at) about my things. I used to collect Snow globes and it was the Christmas after Beck was born that he dropped one and it hit another one and they both broke and I rushed to him and scooped him up and didn't even give the snow globes a second thought, well, except to dump them into the trash. Stephen came home and was flabbergasted that I had not bawled uncontrollably for these lost treasures. Because if it was he who had broken them I would have had his head, but I told him that my baby didn't know any better. So fast forward a few years with many broken treasures in between with not so much as a tear shed, I lost it on Saturday. Full on tears of anguish and sadness. I have this Altoid tin/Brag book that I made of Beck's pictures and it holds a pictures from each month of his first year of life. I was just about to finish Paisley's same Altoid tin of all the pictures of her month to month when I remembered that I had washed my diaper bag. I RAN to the dryer and sure enough my treasure was tumble dried and some parts still dripping with her little hand print with ripped fingers, and smeared pictures, yep, I lost it, full out hissy fit, bawling on the floor, crumpled, Stephen thought I had broke my leg.... but nope just a broken heart, so I am starting again.... Bummer deal. I guess I still am anal, but my focus is now on things dealing with my kids. :) And those dang dishes in the sink that mock me....